In The Wilderness

Have you ever had one of those moments where, say its been a rough week and your just feeling really bogged down and kinda discouraged, and then all of a sudden, in a single moment, everything gets put back into perspective? I had one of those this week. I love those moments, because to me thats when you realize that God is there fighting for you. Not that he hasn't been doing that the whole time, yet that moment is when you realize that he already has the victory. Last weekend and on into the early part of the week I was really getting discouraged and frustrated with myself and some situations I've been dealing with. Thats when I finally learned the value of withdrawing to a private place to seek God...going into the wilderness. So I took a walk to a park, and literally just sat and read his word and prayed, and it was amazing to just be still. I had never really thought about how Jesus would "withdraw to a quiet place" and spent time with God. Jesus. If God incarnate would spend time with his heavenly Father in a quiet place, how much more do we need to? 

But the moment that hit me wasn't until last friday at Encounter, the Ocean's Edge night of worship. As we took communion together as a body, and all around me people were singing and worshiping God, I realized that thats what heaven will be like. All the believers were worshiping together as one body. It was awesome. All the stress and troubles from the week suddenly seemed so insignificant. Why was I stressed and worrying? God has already won. 

Two songs really hit home as I was going through this last week...both from Contrary Motion. Prodigal and To My Rescue. These lyrics are so inspired and really touched my heart last week:

"Waves are crashing, storms are raging, I don't see you there...then you come running to my rescue again, so far I've fallen, only you can save me now, you're running to my rescue again, how many times, how many times, will you be there to catch me"

"You are a Lover, whose touch I can't mistake, my source of comfort, when the whole world fades away, you are a healer whose making all thats broken whole, and I am whole"

I Guess Beauty Does Come From Pain

Emotions are a funny thing. I've never really been a super emotional girl, I figure, who needs that hassle? Not my style. If something upsets me, you will rarely know it. I love to be happy. I also hate uncomfortable situations, I would rather be hurt than bring something up to make someone else uncomfortable or hurt. And I always want the hurt to go away...preferably ASAP. However, I'm not so sure that's really the best course of action. There was a sermon at Calvary not too long ago, taught be Doug Souder I believe, regarding suffering. He talked about how often our first reaction is to seek the end to the hard or hurt times, but then we end up missing the lesson we needed to learn in the first place. Pain hurts...obviously. It's not fun. But its probably one of the most effective teaching tools because when we are hurting we don't rely on ourselves because we simply can't, pain shows us our weaknesses. When we are uncomfortable, we are much more apt to change. Its human nature. Often we are content to stay where we are until it becomes to uncomfortable and we have to change something. One thing i've had to learn lately is that some things just take time to heal. They can't be fixed overnight, or by talking, or by changing the subject. They need to settle, and the healing process simply can't be rushed. But the other side of that process is unbelievably great. Once the pain ends, the healing can be completed. God is so faithful not to leave us where we are. I've heard it said "God loves us exactly as we are, but he loves us to much to leave us that way" That in itself is comforting. The God of the universe is loving us and teaching us through every trial we face, so he can shape us into his image. And isn't that our goal?